Monday, April 13, 2009
Notice--I'm Going To Be Away
I am going to be away for the next two weeks....but I have just made arrangements so that I should have at least SOME access to the internet. Please do continue to post, and I will try to keep up with my publishing of those posts. Newcomers, please check out the posting below entitled "The Launching of This Blog." You will find some exciting comments, and I encourage you all to join in, and partake in peer supporting! I think you will find it to be good for you too! Onward (as a friend of mine always says)!
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Hi .. I'm back and have caught up on the posts so far. I'm not used to blogs at all, and feeling hesitant.
ReplyDeleteIt scares me to read about the hospital experiences, because I will probably be presenting myself for hospitalization within the next few days. Maybe even tomorrow.
I've been hospitalized before, and never had any really BAD experiences, except the times I was detoxing from alcohol. I haven't had a drink in over two years, thankfully. But, I also haven't had access to meds or treatment for over a year now due to insurance issues. I'm feeling very unsteady. Getting up in the morning is not my biggest concern at the moment. Maybe when I feel better.
I hate to sound like a whiner. My diag is 2polar. I've been on disability since 2003, and I still can't admit it to myself. I don't want to be 'disabled'.
At that time I had been on meds for about three years and doing well. Then a stress episode at work brought it all crashing down, and one of my meds stopped helping. I was able to see a therapist for about 15 months then, and that was the first time ever that I realized WHY I did so many crazy things. It made sense for once.
Since what we have is not visible, and we are without symptoms some of the time, people start thinking we are 'normal'. I don't tell anyone my diag now because I found that if they know, once I do something they don't like, they scream at me that I'm "crazy".
One poster said she prefers the frantic times more than depression. I do too, except I'm getting older and the mania is so hard on me physically. A price to pay.
I'm doing things that are not good for me again. I appreciate the Buddhist post. Reminds me to not allow my thouhts to upset me so much.
I have to hope that the hospital won't be horrible. I have Medicare now and that could, but shouldn't, affect the treatment. It hasn't so far. I just keep reminding myself that at least I will see a doctor with a script pad! Also, it's better than completely giving up.
Thanks for reading.
Hi there, my friend....
ReplyDeleteFirst, I want to say that I feel for you, being at a point where you are recognizing that you need hospitalization. I know that being at this point can be very scary....but I can see that this is also a very smart, well-thought-out, and calculative move on your part. I want to commend you for that. You seem to really know what you are doing.
Yes, going to the hospital does seem like the logical move if you have not had access to meds for a long time. You will surely be able to get treated there by a psychiatrist.
If you have Medicare, there is no reason, to my knowledge, why you shouldn't be able to be treated by a psychiatrist out in the community. If the co-pay is the issue, think again! We now have mental health parity with Medicare as of July 2008 thanks to Congress! Instead of having to pay a 50% copay with Medicare, we now only have to pay the same 20%, as we would if we were being treated for any other physical illness! How terrific is that? I, too, am on Disability (although I hope to be able to be free of the government's grips ASAP), and I receive Medicare as well. I am thrilled with this new law because it means that we now have psychiatric services more readily available to us. There aren't a whole lot of Dr.'s who accept Medicare, but there are a few, if you do your homework. I'm not sure who you are (and I certainly don't expect you to identify yourself, although you seem to know who I am)...but if you're a Maryland resident, I can give you the web address to MAPS-MD--a website which can help Maryland residents to find providers within the public mental health system, among other things. The provider list is not the most up-to-date, and I have encountered many phone numbers of Dr.s which no longer exist, but there are that many more which DO exist, and can help you. Please let me know if you'd like that web address, and I'll be happy to list it for you.
My friend, I hope your hospital experience will be a good one. The days of torturous experience in hospitals, although far from over, are now much more few and far between. Many states, especially Maryland, have strict policies about seclusion and restraint, and are working on having those practices eliminated altogether....(I hope)....I can say first-hand, that hospital stays can actually be somewhat pleasant, depending on what kind of unit they put you on...they can even be extremely relieving if you are able to be treated for your illness, and you respond well. The hospital can feel like a place of safety and refuge for some, where they can work out their problems in a quiet, safe environment. Of course, you don't want to get TOO comfy though!
I wish you all the best, and will be thinking of you. My warmest thoughts and prayers go out to you as you go into the hospital.
--Your friendly Peer Supporter
That is great news about the copay change! I wasn't aware of that. There's some confusion on whether or not I have outpatient coverage now, or if it won't be effective until 7/01/2009. I tried to work for the past two years, and could not afford to work and pay Medicare premiums :( They make it as difficult as possible to get off SDI and on your own feet. I had to give up the effort in November, opting for medical coverage.
ReplyDeleteIf I go to one of two possible hospitals in the area, I will be seeing the psych that treated me for many years before disability. That would probably be best. I also have an appointment at his office on 5/8, but again am not certain of the coverage date. It sure takes a load off knowing that copay won't be 50% though!
The last psych I saw was in another city where I was living at the time, and he was awful. He made me feel suicidal! I was in tears by the time I got to the parking lot.
I've only been in isolation once, and it was because I was self medicated.
I will probably go on Monday. Just have to get through the rest of the weekend.
Thank you for your reply.
I'm glad I could give you some good news about the Medicare copay! Hope the weekend wasn't too bad for you and that you were able to hang in there. I wish you all the best....
ReplyDelete